I have been trying to write a gap-filler scene all weekend, initially because it needed to be written, now because it refuses to be written and I am taking a stand.
And that determination is, unfortunately, where things come crashing to a horrible end.
It's not a 'block' per se, I can force the words onto screen or paper, scrawling them out in the hope that something useful can be salvaged from the catastrophe of nouns, verbs, adjectives and other collateral damage, but it doesn't seem to be working. So I try slowing and hoping for some intervention of inspiration.
This mostly results in my staring at the screen, little finger pressing down the shift button to start my next sentence, while I tap lightly against F and J on the keyboard, in case sudden inspiration flashes past and I have to touch-type it down quickly before it escapes.
FJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJF
Twenty minutes later and I have a page of 'f' followed by 'j' which, whilst making a satisfying clatter at the time of typing, is somewhat disappointing to redraft.
BUT if inspiration does appear I am ready. my left pointer finger is on F and my right is on J and this actually does mean that, ergonomically, my fingers are ready for anything that can be thrown at them.
FJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJF
This is theory is, of course, total bollocks and mostly results in my trying to work out words with both 'f' and 'j' in. Spicy words mainly, like 'fajita' or 'jalfrezi'.
This is likely because it is coming up to lunch.
FJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJF
There's also 'jiffy' and 'jeff', and there's 'Jif' bathroom cleaner, but they've rebranded that as 'Cif' now and so it no longer meets the requirements.
Although 'Jif Lemon' juice still exists, so perhaps that counts instead?
FJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJF
To get back to food, there's FRijj milkshakes and Jaffa Cakes (should that be one word or two?), both of which are brand names and thus completely useless in Scrabble, as are Fujifilm and Fujitsu.
FJFJFJFJFJFJFJF
Fiji.
FJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJFJF
The problem I have, one of the many problems I have, is that the reason I skipped this scene, was that I couldn’t think of anything that wasn’t trite and/or uninspired, and I still have no idea how to bridge the written scenes. I just can’t get from 'A' to 'B'. (At least if I was going from 'A' to Z' I'd be two letters down already (namely 'f' and 'j') and only have 12/13ths remaining.)
As it is, all I can assume is that I am not starting with either F or J, mostly because if anything began with F or J I would have reached it already.
Maybe I’ll switch fingers and practice ‘d’ and ‘k’ a while. Perhaps that was where I was going wrong all along?
DKDKDKDKDKDKDKDKDKDKDKDKD...
